FRIDAY – I can do this…

Ahhhh – the weekend. I have quit enough times before to know that I need a plan. Leave nothing to chance. Leaving stuff to chance is opening the door to the attitude of “what the f@#k I am gonna have a glass of wine” and I NEVER mean “a” glass. Never understood the point in that frankly. I am after the buzz, the numb, the warm, checked out feeling. A glass doesn’t get me there. So I have made very clear plans with my husband tonight. Japanese food and a movie. For some reason Japanese food – which I LOVE – never seems to go with red wine for me. I actually prefer green tea or water which is why when drinking, I eat Japanese food only at lunch. HA! I’ve go it all figured out. So very intentionally I have chosen Japanese as the dinner out.

When drinking I am never interested in movies. Nobody serves me wine there. What is the point? May as well rent them at home and I can drink without restraint. Sad fact though, I really love going out to movies. One more thing to add to the list of things that wine steals from me. I will also go to yoga and work out during the day today in preparation of feeling GREAT and being proud of not throwing my hard work down the drain by drinking a bottle and a half of cheap red wine. The other thing I am so grateful for as I think about my plans tonight is the fact that I will be able to read for a little bit before turning out the light. After drinking I cannot read because I am unable to focus on the words and it makes me dizzy. So of course, I have not been reading too much lately. As I write these things down, it never ceases to amaze and sadden me how much I put on the red wine altar. As I clean up around the house today I will listen to an episode of the Bubble Hour. That show feels like hanging out friends who really know you. By the end I lose any will to drink for the next little while. That is how I stayed alcohol free last Friday night. Didn’t make it Saturday night – but that is the past and I have moved on from there. Day six today and feeling pretty good about my plan. Can’t wait to wake up feeling fresh and fly tomorrow morning!

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